Wednesday, March 12, 2008

There IS Something in the Water!

So it seems that there is something in the water after all. When my wife was pregnant with my first son, it seemed that every other woman in the office was pregnant, too. The joke was that there must be something in the water.

Turns out, there is. But it's not making women pregnant, or even more fertile.

Or is it?

Conspiracy theorists might say that the government is tainting our water in order to control us. They might be right. At the very least, the government, through knowledge of the problem and inaction, has made a choice: Let us drink water at our own peril.

An AP investigation found that the tap water of at least 41 million American citizens is tainted with pharmaceuticals like ibuprofen, anti-depressants, and Viagra.


I say, put in more! We could have happy zombies walking around in a daze with boners. And nobody will get pregnant because there is so much birth control medication in the water that the survival of the species is at risk.

I say this all in jest, of course. But it's a sad fact that we have become a drug-addicted bunch of lazy people wanting a quick fix to everything but aren't willing to pay for a real solution. The real solution, by the way, is a better water treatment system. Private enterprise, no doubt, will find a solution to this problem, but only at a huge cost. If the government gave a damn, they figure out a resolution pronto.

But there's really no incentive, is there? In fact, a voting public with its wits fully intact is kind of counter to the power elite's cause.

AP probe finds drugs in drinking water - Yahoo! News