Celebrity poop: Malibu septic tanks might be leaking into the Pacific Ocean

THIS SOUNDS LIKE A SHITTY PROPOSITION:

Malibu officials are determined to get to the bottoms of its celebrity inhabitants. You see, leaking septic tanks might be causing sewage to leak into the Pacific Ocean, which might be causing increased bacteria levels in the water. This is an environmental hazard that must be resolved.

So, the city of Malibu is prepared to take water samples, trace it back to the source, via DNA, and make the property owner(s) responsible for the mess to pay up.